Call me by your name – Mystery of Love

In a faraway place, where summer blooms in its full power and fairy people can discover the mystery of love, two boys called each other by their own name.

Oliver…

Elio…

Little beauties of Summer deep in the old west,
Broken egg shells,
Yolk dripping down your fingers,
Detached pages of an old book,
Wrinkled sheets that smell of flowers,
A Hidden pond with water cold as ice,
The smell of grass and peaches,
Diving on Summer full head on,
Such are the conditions of a summer love.

Love is truly magical. It knows no pride. “Is it better to speak or to die?” Let us speak, let us forever speak!

Love is not just about the romantic love for love is universal and if you can find it, hold it close for as long as you can. It can be called love between friends, or love between lovers, it really does not matter, for it is simply love. I imagine I would be doomed if their light would stop flickering in the same dimension as me. If you truly love someone, should you die first or last?

In the movie, Elio, the 17 year old boy, becomes interested in the Jewish man, Oliver, that comes to spend his summer working with Elio’s father while they are in their villa in Italy. Elio begins to study Oliver’s behavior and starts to become frustrated when he realizes he might like him. The whole story is a journey of self-discovery and his dilemma “Is it better to speak or to die?”.  

Yet, he speaks and they fall in love and they create a friendship deeper than an audience could understand. In the end, Oliver has to leave and Elio knows that. Despite knowing that he is leaving, despite the pain, he is grateful to have lived for a while in the same moment as Oliver. Despite knowing their lives will be separated, they are grateful to have called each other in their own name, for their soul has created a connection deeper than time and change.

In the end, the father of Elio gives a speech.

When you least expect it, Nature has cunning ways of finding our weakest spot. Just remember: I am here. Right now you may not want to feel anything. Perhaps you never wished to feel anything. And perhaps it’s not to me that you’ll want to speak about these things. But feel something you obviously did.

You had a beautiful friendship. Maybe more than a friendship. And I envy you. In my place, most parents would hope the whole thing goes away, to pray that their sons land on their feet. But I am not such a parent. In your place, if there is pain, nurse it. And if there is a flame, don’t snuff it out. Don’t be brutal with it. We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster, that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to make yourself feel nothing so as not to feel anything ― what a waste! 
~Call me by your Name

It is truly something that one should hold as a dear memory when they find someone they love, being them friends or lovers. Many times you are forced to leave, to go to your own lives far away, but those memories, those special memories where you would casually tell each other “I love you”, when they would bring you a can of Coke because they knew how much you like it, will always remain. Even if that person builds their own life away from you, even if they find other people to laugh and smile with, you have to know no one can rob you from that “I love you”. If your star shines bright, you will maybe meet them again and maybe it will be as before, or maybe it will not. Sometimes circumstances change, but you will always care for that person, and they will care for the memory of you. We live a thousand lives and our memory takes a life of its own, independent of our being. Do not be jealous of it.

Remember than when you love someone, there is no pride. If you make mistakes, let go of any ego and bow to them. If you did not make any mistakes, still let go of your ego and call them. If you were truly special to each other, they will call back always.

“And it came to me then. That we were wonderful traveling companions but in the end no more than lonely lumps of metal in their own separate orbits. From far off they look like beautiful shooting stars, but in reality they’re nothing more than prisons, where each of us is locked up alone, going nowhere. When the orbits of these two satellites of ours happened to cross paths, we could be together. Maybe even open our hearts to each other. But that was only for the briefest moment. In the next instant we’d be in absolute solitude. Until we burned up and became nothing.”
~Sputnik Sweetheart by Haruki Murakami

Always hoping my satellite will cross paths again with theirs. I was born under a lucky star.

Lord, I no longer believe
Drowned in living waters
Cursed by the love that I received
From my brother’s daughter
Like Hephaestion, who died
Alexander’s lover
Now my riverbed has dried
Shall I find no other?
~ Mystery of Love
by Sufjan Stevens (soundtrack used for the movie and my favourite singer)

2 thoughts on “Call me by your name – Mystery of Love

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s